Kevin Federline

Name: Kevin Federline

Likes: Polluting the gene pool, Front running

Jeez, take a look at this one. The douchiness here is almost palpable. It's hard to look at this picture and not immediately wish for a meteorite, a flash-flood, or a juicy tomato at the very least.

Kevin Federline, known by most for his white trash, fast food, tabloid romance with Britney Spears, purports himself to be some kind of dancer and, I can barely type it, "musician". Thankfully, even the most vapid and tasteless music listeners had no stomach for his brand of noise pollution, and the record failed miserably.

A reckless procreator, the 32 year old Federline has 4 children with 2 women (Shar Jackson, Britney Spears), neither of whom he is currently involved with. Class.

Mel Hall

Name: Mel Hall

Likes: Hanging Sliders, Little Girls

Mel Hall, former New York Yankee, was arrested in June of 2007, in Texas, and charged with sexual assault on a minor. Hall had 134 HR's in major leagues, and at least 3 in the minors...

He was convicted on three counts of aggravated sexual assault of a child and two counts of indecency with a child, and was sentenced to 45 years in prison. He must serve 22 years and 4 months before he's eligible for parole.

Harry Rupnarine

Name: Harry Rupnarine

Likes: Nick Swisher's moxie, Murder

Harry Rupnarine, a former transit cop, was found guilty of murdering his fiancee on a Woodhaven street back on May 10, 2007. Rupnarine, 39, shot Guiatree Hardat, 22, in the back of the head after a heated argument over wedding money. He claimed that he had accidentally killed her with his 9 mm service Glock while trying to shoot two knife-wielding thugs.
According to her friends, Rupnarine was frequently jealous and violent. His former Police Academy Instructor found him disruptive and suggested that he be kicked out of the Academy. Unfortunately the request was denied, so Rupnarine graduated and was issued a gun - the same gun he used to kill Hardat.

He was sentenced to 25 years-to-life, without ever witnessing the majesty of the new Yankee Stadium. Shame.

Greg Packer

Name: Greg Packer

Likes: Jorge Posada's ears, Attention, Freeloading

Greg Packer is known by many media outlets as a professional "Man on the Street". He has been quoted in more than 100 articles and television broadcasts as a general member of the public. He also prides himself (and his family, no doubt) in being the first person in line for events or product releases. He was first in line to see ground zero when the viewing platform opened in lower Manhattan. He also slept outside in the snow to be the first in line to greet President George W. Bush after his inauguration.

Here in this photo, Mr Packer is seen looking for handouts while waiting to be the first to buy an iPhone. He seems to contradict himself when he says "This is what I like doing. You only live once, you might as well make the most of it."

Well, Greg, I bestow upon you the honor of being the first bozo in a long line of bozos, murderers, rapists, pedophiles, bank robbers, and general undesirables (Yankee Fans/Actual Yankees - all) to be featured here on Pinstripe Poison Control.